MyCoach’s Notes: Do You Have Human Skills?

Do You Have Human Skills?
By Colle Davis

In today’s rough-and-tumble world, the high-value outcome is to get the deal, win the argument, get your way, or prove a point. The aim is to show others that you or your company are number one in some narrow and specific arena.

Human skills work best when you are in the game of life to help others learn, get their outcomes, and succeed. Listening carefully, ensuring you understand what the other person is saying, and responding instead of reacting are vital skills to becoming an effective leader. These skills require training, feedback, and patience.

• Why are these skills not taught in schools, colleges, or businesses?
• How would the world be different if these skills were used in parenting children?
• Would the use of these skills improve marriages?

Human skills are the behaviors that HR and others refer to as ‘soft skills,’ you know, rapport, listening, empathy, and social skills that keep life flowing forward; they are more accurately called human skills. They are not hard skills like programming or assembling components or building machinery or buildings; they are more critical.

There’s NO Such Thing as “Soft Skills” with Simon Sinek

These high-level human skills are necessary to interact with others and work well with our pets. There is nothing soft about them. They are powerful, essential, and sorely lacking in our modern world. Some people still use the social requirements of being polite, courteous, and caring; those are the skills we refer to here.

A polite and caring person’s impact on those around them is profound. People remember and honor them, and they are seen as powerful influencers and leaders. We need more people with human skills. How do we get them?

• Compliments are an easy and powerful way to influence.
• Yelling at someone or denigrating them is also easy and powerful but yields different results.

Think about that for a moment. Which one of these behaviors is your preferred inbound message? Which are you quick to dish out? Not fun, is it, being called on your stuff?

Here is an oddity: People have a tough time accepting compliments. I must teach my clients to be gracious and supportive when receiving compliments. Giving compliments is almost as hard as receiving them. Begin offering them until some rewards show up. They can be challenging to maintain. Practice helps.

                Manager, “You did a great job on the report.”

                Your response, “Thanks. I appreciate that.”

                See how easy that was? 

Having difficult conversations is not always easy, and practicing human skills makes them more accessible and more productive.

What will having elegant human skills do for you and our organization? The article below covers their importance and impact on your resume.

LAND THE JOB: 93% of employers want to see soft skills on your resume—here are 8 of the most in-demand ones – CNBC, Make It

When was the last time you held a door open for someone? When was the last time you paid a compliment to a waitperson? Have you thanked your spouse/roommate for some small kindness toward you? These questions lead you to elegant human skills and greater success.

For additional help, watch the video above, read the article, and then contact me for more help.